Jogging is for noobs (update 1)

Ok. Cow is back to report on his adventures while noob-jogging. Cow just finished the jogging track for 1 round and tired. Cow still feel that jogging is for noobs. Here's why: -

1) After 4 times of jogging in a week, cow still feel the fitness is really not improving. Maybe cow needs to limit smoking and eating mcDonald's after jogging. Fitness level improve from -23 to -22.999. VICTORY!!!!

2) F*cking town district are not doing their job. What the f*ck. There's freaking branches that is so low beside the road and it may hurt blurry joggers like me. My eyesight is fine but when I jog, my spectacles will get cloudy because of the steam coming out from my hot body!! And what about those drain holes in the middle of the jogging track with no lids (SOmeone might fall inside there, genius district people!!!!) Noobness at the best!!

3) One of the plus side of jogging is being able to see the beauty of nature. Woooppsss, there's not much 'nature' in a city, is there? What I mean is beautiful creation from God which is made to complete men: GIRLS. But just as I was about to gaze on these lovely creatures I smell something. No, it's not fart. It's in fact, PERFUME. How ridiculous. If these girls are looking to keep fit and sweat, why do they need PERFUME. Really nice. How bout next time wearing make-up to jog. Yup. That's the fashion trend now NOOOB girls...

Conclusion is, cow still need to improve to cut down on the fat and improve stamina. Stay tuned for more cow adventures.^^

Jogging is for Noobs

Went jogging after 1 month of doing no exercise. Was in good spirit but after this jogging session I feel crap. Here's the reason why jogging is for noobs:-

a) Realized that on a scale of 1-10, my level of fitness is -23. I ran for 10 seconds and then I was feeling pain in my chest so I walked for 50 seconds and then ran for 5 secs and walked for 1 minit 30 secs. Than I ran for ran 2 more 3-secs run and walked home. F*ck. My fitness is lower than a cow.

b) Once u jog, u can never go back. I ran half of the jogging track and feel so heavy and my head started seeing Britney Spears dancing in a baju kurung and felt that I want to go home but I am already faraway and the only way is take a taxi which will make me feel like a super-noob so I had to finish the freaking jogging track. Damn mother-o! They should make a service on rescuing extremely exhausted nooby joggers

c) Arrived at home and realized that I locked myself out and my housemates are not at home so I wasted rm30 in asking the locksmith to come. Crap!!! WHY is my innocent desire to just jog my ass off is being punished like this!!!!!????

Damnit... really an ass day. Jogging sucks. Jogging is dipsh!t. Jogging can go to Paris and jump from Eiffel Tower. You suck the hell out, jogging!!! I Hate u, jogging!!!

Conclusion is Jogging is for noobs. Noobs like me.......